I look forward to working with you in one or more of these areas:
Counseling for Individuals
- "No man is an island, entire of itself ...." Everyone is part of a context, is part of some larger story, and belongs somewhere. At the heart of my work with individuals is helping them to tell their stories and discover where they belong.
- Our goal is to create a "big enough" relationship that includes all of the past, present and future of her and of him, and all of the various "parts" of him and of her. We work together to increase understanding, sympathy, acceptance and respect, and then move on to practical solutions. We can't avoid all conflict, but we can learn to manage it lovingly and wisely.
- The more people, the more complexity. Our main goals are understanding how each one influences the other and the entire family system, establishing healthy structures in the home, and cultivating healthy one-to-one relationships between everyone in the family.
- Most people prepare less for marriage then for getting their driver's license! What would you like to know about the person you hope to spend the rest of your life with? How can you learn to disagree in marriage, without being disagreeable? Premarital counseling provides you with skills and tools to make your transition into married life less bumpy and more joyful.
- For many people life is incomprehensible without taking into account the knowledge of God and God's will for their lives. Whatever your starting point, I am deeply interested in your understanding of and experience with God. Where is God in your thoughts, feelings, habits and relationships?
Counseling for Clergy and Clergy Couples
- Along with the high privilege of leading a congregation comes a special challenge: balancing the seemingly-endless needs of the congregation with the priorities of connection to spouse, children, family of origin, and one's own self-care. We can work together to rebalance priorities and move you toward greater spiritual, emotional and relational health.
Grief and Bereavement Counseling
- We can't not grieve, but we can learn how to grieve well, progressing through the stages of grieving in a gentle and healthy way, by ourselves and in the company of others. "Good grieving" is one of the great keys to emotional and spiritual health.
- True peace-making is not appeasing, blaming, coldly calculating or changing the subject, but addressing issues in a non-anxious way that is clear, direct, honest, respectful and kind. Together we'll practice lowering the emotional temperature and engaging the wiser parts of ourselves.
Communication Skills Training
- We humans are walking, talking judgement-making machines! But we can be retrained to non-judgmentally observe the behavior of others, accurately identify the impact their behavior has on us, clearly discern whether our needs are being met, and compassionately ask for behaviors that will be more life-giving for us.
Twelve Step Recovery Counseling
- Millions of people have been and are being helped to overcome addictions through involvement in Twelve Step fellowships. People begin to heal, get better and grow in small group fellowships characterized by "the shared honesty of mutual vulnerability openly acknowledged." Together we can do what we could never do alone!
Workshops and Seminars
- I teach hands-on, interactive workshops and seminars on each of the above topics, and others. I am available for half-day or full day presentations, as well as retreats.
Visit my blog
Check out my blog about emotional health, self-care, recovery and spirituality
Jay R. Feld
In my work with individuals, couples, families and groups I desire to create an environment of safety, affirmation, encouragement and empowerment, in which clients can become more fully alive to themselves, to others and to God.